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CAN YOU CURE ME
SLEEP DISORDER PATIENTS
Sleep disorder clinic intake patient questionnaire
please check off each answer in its corresponding square
eyes are dry, check
insides ache, check
can't stay asleep, check
can't stay awake, check
anxious dreams, check
racing thoughts, check
and your stomach's all tied up in knots, check
Can you cure me?
Can you cure me?
(The PATIENTS continue to fill in their forms, responding to individual questions)
MURRAY
Do I snore? Do I snore. and my wife won't take it any more
LEON
Always tired? Always tired. and if I fall asleep at work i'm fired
HADARA
Legs that twitch? Legs that twitch. all night long they shake and burn and itch
CHERYL
Nightmare sleep? Nightmare sleep. and it's about enough to make me weep
PATIENTS
Can you cure me? Can you cure me?
(The ORDERLY enters. HE is making final preparations for overnight tests, going through his nightly checklist.)
ORDERLY
change the sheets, check
pull the drape, check
electrode glue, check
adhesive tape, check
sweep the hall, check
sweep the stairs, check
and distribute patient questionnaires, check
PATIENTS
Can you cure me?
ORDERLY
Hi, hi there.
PATIENTS
Can you cure me?
ORDERLY
I hope so.
PATIENTS
Fix my problems with a pill
keep me safe and keep me still
help me doctor, can you cure me?
ORDERLY
Sorry, I'm just the orderly. Doctor's over there.
(DOCTOR walks through area, opening her mail. She receives bad news--another grant rejected. PATIENTS compete, unsuccessfully, for her attention.)
LEON
help me,
doctor,
I'm going crazy,
I gotta getta little sleep
MURRAY
you gotta help me,
doctor,
this is my last chance,
before I drive away my wife
CHERYL
help me,
doctor,
if I can't get this right,
i'm no good for anything
HADARA
help me, doctor,
PATIENTS
give me back my life
DOCTOR
Did you fill out the other side of the form?
PATIENTS
(Turning over the forms they've filled out, which reveal a:)
sleep disorder clinic supplemental questionnaire
exhaustion, check worry, check quick to anger or despair
check check check check check check check check check check check check check check check check
(They again converge around DOCTOR).
PATIENTS
Let me get some sleep tonight
let me wake and feel all right
help me doctor, can you cure me?
help me doctor help me doctor
Can you cure me?
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